Do your values align with those around you?
This is something I’ve been reflecting on a lot lately.
2019 so far seems to be a year of MASSIVE change for myself and a lot of my friends and clients. Whatever hasn’t been serving them, or whatever’s not working, seems to have found a way to grind to a halt - sometimes in a dramatic fashion - so that they can move forward.
You know - the changes you’ve been thinking about making for months (or years) that you haven’t yet been able to push through to make… Those changes that the universe decides to shove you in the direction of so that you ACTUALLY make them, rather than just thinking about it?
This could be any area of your life - where you live, your relationship, a friendship, a career, a business…
I believe that, if your values don’t align with those around you or indeed with the life you’re living yourself, change needs to be made because life - your situation - is not going to feel right until you ARE surrounded by those who share similar values and until you are living the values that truly feel right to you.
You’ve heard the saying that we’re the sum of the five people we surround ourselves with?
If we feel disconnected with those people on a lot of levels, it can feel incredibly challenging.
When our values change (or when we embrace the values we truly want to pursue in our lives), this is when people start to fade away and others - more aligned to your energy - appear.
Don’t blame this process, or allow it to make you feel like you are lacking.
The reason that it’s happening is so that you can embrace everything new that is coming into your life. So that you will have space for it.
If you’re going through a phase of massive change, here’s what I’ve found to be helpful:
Embrace the change - don’t fight it. Know that even though it’s uncomfortable, and can feel disheartening, sad, scary, lonely, even devastating (insert any number of emotions that may pop up for us during times of change)… Know that there is always something better and more in alignment with your values on the other side.
Allow yourself to feel. Feel all the emotions, rather than suppress them with [insert your go-to non-serving habit of choice].
Talk about it with a trusted friend, mentor or coach, rather than bottling it up. They will help you process what you are experiencing.
Re-establish what your top values are. Write them down. Examples could include health, creativity, positivity, honesty, family… Write out a list of all the values you can think of, then choose the top five that feel right to you right now. Write them down, and pop them on your bathroom mirror so that you can see them and feel connected with them every day.
Maintain self care. This is so much easier said than done - particularly during trying times of change. Usually, it’s the thing we most need but it’s the one thing that slips off the to-do list when everything feels so overwhelming. This may look like one workout a week rather than five for the time being. It could look like five minutes of meditation rather than 20. Which leads me to my final point…
Go easy on yourself. Change is NEVER easy and you’ll need time to get through it.
Are you going through massive change in 2019? I’d love to hear from you - email me here to let me know. Sending loads of positive vibes your way.